Kits to Heart: Bringing Solidarity to Those Affected by Cancer - Sonia Su (POY 55)

Having cancer can be a sad and lonely experience, or at least so I've heard. The symptoms it creates in the process of treating them can be brutal, and they can have a secondary effect, isolation from friends and loved ones. The good news is that hospitals and cancer wards are places where the kindest of us often give of themselves, and that can also have effects on survivors in the long term. I talked with the founder of an organization that's bringing some warmth to cancer patients in the US, and I asked her how any of us can get involved in their mission. I'm Josh Morgan. That conversation is coming up next on the plural of you, the podcast about people helping people. I'm a data analyst and sociologist living in Baltimore, Maryland, and I want to honor as many kind and helpful people as I can in my lifetime because I aspire to be like them. I publish this podcast on the 15th of every month so I can introduce them to you. You can check out episodes from the past nine years. Subscribe if you haven't already, wherever you get your podcasts. And if you wouldn't mind, tell a friend if you liked this episode. I hope you'll enjoy the show this month, I'd like to introduce you to Sonia Su. She's the founder and executive director of Kits, Two Heart, a non profit organization based in Clarksville, Maryland, about half an hour southwest of Baltimore. Kits to heart distributes curated care packages or kits to cancer patients at hospitals and cancer centers in Maryland, and they ship kits to cancer patients in all 50 us states. The idea is to provide support and resources to these patients to make their cancer journeys a little easier. Sonia survived non Hodgkin's lymphoma three times. She received a kit herself during one of her lowest points in medical treatment, and it moved her so deeply that she decided to pay the action forward. Now she's devoted her life to the cause of supporting other cancer patients. She uses her experiences, as well as feedback from patients and caregivers to pack the kits with informational resources and comforting products that are compatible with various cancer treatments. She also started an art for wellness program after several patients and caregivers expressed how lonely the cancer treatment process can be. Well, talk more about what she's up to in a bit. Sonia is one of the sweetest people I've ever spoken with on this podcast. I realized while we were talking that she's an easy person to root for, and other people have seen this too. She's won several awards, including L'Oreal Paris, selecting her as one of ten women of worth in 2023. It's clear in many ways that she's found her niche, and I'm honored that she made time to talk with me about it. Here's my conversation with Sonia Su, founder and executive director at Kits to Heart. As we start here, I just wanted to give you your flowers for all the success you've had so far and all the awards you won and everything, because it. I mean, I've never dealt with cancer directly, but all the people I've met, you know, it becomes a thing, like an event in your life that you identify with for a long time after, and you've taken this event that's happened to you and you haven't let it define you. You've, like, done the opposite. You've. You've turned it around and made it something positive. So I just wanted to say good for you, for, uh, for doing all of that.

Yeah. Thank you so much. Yeah. Definitely not easy, but, um, I'm happy to be where I am now. Yeah.

Yeah. Where were you in your life when you first learned that you had cancer?

When I first learned that I had cancer, I actually was just starting my second semester at Georgetown. I was pursuing a master's in asian studies, and it definitely came as a huge shock because I was only 24 years old at the time. And, of course, at that time, I had huge ambitions to actually work abroad, either for their foreign service or in some capacity where I could combine my passion for telling other people's stories similar to what you're doing and my interest in asian history and culture. It was really crazy to think that this diagnosis really just paused all of that and made me really take a step back. At the same time, though, because I was still very much in the middle of my program, I really felt like, okay, it's a pause, but I still want to keep going and, you know, hopefully just return and just finish up my degree, which is what I ended up doing, and figure out everything from there. So I was at a stage where I was still very much like a young, ambitious person, where I thought, like, you know, I could just, you know, live abroad, pursue the passions that I thought I've always had and. Yeah, sorry about. Do you hear that? My dog barking. Sorry about that.

Yeah, no, that's okay. It's your supervisor in this conversation.

Yeah.

So what was the process of receiving treatment like when you first started that journey?

So, after I was diagnosed, I had to take a medical leave of absence and begin a series of treatments that ended up taking a couple months, and by the end of that semester that I took off, I was in remission. And upon hearing that, I was pretty much set on moving forward with my plan of pursuing a fellowship abroad. So once I knew that I was in remission and I also was accepted for this fellowship, I pursued it, and I ended up flying around the world to Taiwan to pursue mandarin study. And it was within a few months, actually, I was experiencing some new symptoms, but also some old symptoms. So it was very confusing. And in the end, I realized that it was a relapse. And unfortunately, I had to cut my fellowship short and fly back for treatments. So the whole experience was very much movie like, because I literally was like, you know, in a different country, felt these annoying and frustrating symptoms that, of course, ended up terrifying me, because by the time I knew I needed to fly back, I felt really afraid of what was going to happen because I was. I remember just feeling very uncomfortable on the flight back home. And then by the time I. I remember when I landed, I literally got an email from my oncologist saying, it sounds like, based on my symptoms, that I've relapsed. And so just reading that and feeling how I felt at that time was just something that I hope no one ever has experienced, but it's something that made me feel like, oh, like, not only did I have to cut my fellowship short, I also have to now deal with a relapse and not knowing whether I would even survive. And so the whole experience definitely was scary. And especially when I was doing this, it felt like I was doing it alone, especially because no one else, of course, at that age, knows anything about cancer unless it's their grandmother or grandparents. But I was just very lucky to have had the support of my family, who really helped to basically take me back in. I moved back home with them. They were able to cook the meals for me, do my laundry, basic things, because treatments definitely were hard at times and not being able to really take care of myself anymore.

You say that you weren't able to take care of yourself anymore. Is it because you felt so sick?

Yeah. So I had to get treatments, chemotherapy, every three weeks, and, like, the first week after those treatments are always the hardest. Like, I was very nauseous. I I didn't even know what that feeling was. Like. I would. That's how new being sick was to me, because I was so young and healthy at that time, like, before that, that I didn't realize, like, that's what nausea felt like, you know, that's. That's what I was, you know, I was literally in bed, like, feeling like, what am I feeling? Like, why do I feel so uncomfortable? And it wasn't until, sorry for graphic details, I vomited, that I realized, oh, wow, I feel much better after that. It's like, oh, so that's not what you. So it's just, like, just figuring out a lot of things, you know, with my body and, like, my limitations and. But at the same time, of course, my parents being asian parents, but also just parents in general, they just really want to take care of me. And so especially when they see that I'm going through something so difficult, they just want to, like, want to do everything for me. So that's. That's really amazing and really helped me a lot.

Yeah. I'm glad you had a good support system. I'm sure it made the whole process a lot easier for you.

Yes. Yeah, definitely.

And then another form of support that, as far as I understand, that you received was there was some point when you received a care package or, like, a little kit. Can you describe what was in that kit and where you were when you received that?

Yes. So I mentioned that I had relapsed. And after I was, you know, on track to do, like, that second line treatment, the plan was to go into a stem cell transplant to seal the deal. Not only did I have to go through more chemotherapy, the plan was to, after that chemo, I would have to do that transplant. It's really just replacing my bone marrow to ensure that the cancer is gone. But before that transplant, I had to be in remission from that second line of chemo. Unfortunately, it didn't work, and I wasn't able to stay in remission again. Now, at this point, I had to consider a third line treatment, which ended up being a newer treatment called car t cell therapy. So at the time that I received the kit, I was actually going in for my third line treatment. And so, as you can imagine, at that point, I felt really zero energy and zero hope that I would even be able to survive this because the other two lines just didn't work.

I can imagine a lot of what you felt like you described feeling before, like, the frustration, the loneliness, and everything was probably more amplified at that point.

Yeah, absolutely. And so I feel like this care package really helped a lot in my journey. I mean, it arrived at the perfect time. I was walking into my hospital room, getting ready to start this third line, and I remember very clearly, like, it was a crack of dawn. Like, literally, the sun was starting to rise. And then I see a care package that was left on my bed. And I thought it was just a welcome package from the hospital, but it turns out it was from a former patient who was doing well again, and she had been treated in that unit. So it just inspired me so much and motivated me at really my lowest point. And so I literally told myself right then that I would pay that kindness forward. I had renewed energy. I ended up staying in the hospital for eleven days to do that third line treatment, and I took that time afterwards, that summer to recover. And then by that fall, I was back in school with this idea still in the back of my head of, like, oh, how can I pay this board and really help others in my situation? So, yeah, that was something that came as a total surprise and something that I knew that I needed to kind of just, you know, expand in a way because I. I didn't want it to be just, like, you know, a side hobby. I felt like it was almost like my mission to do something with that gift.

Yeah. Like I mentioned before, you turn this event in your life into something that has brought you great success, and it seems like you have taken something that could have been debilitating and just, like, a point of sadness, and you made it something that has become your mission. You were studying asian studies and you were looking to work abroad and that sort of thing. Did that totally change your mission statement for your life?

Oh, yeah, absolutely. So I'm obviously not really doing anything related to my degree.

You're not alone in that.

Yeah, I mean, I think that ends up being common for most or a lot of people, which is, you know, just speaks to how just life happens. You know, it's never. It really never goes the way you plan it for me. Like, I. Right now, I'm really just entirely focused on being a mom, first of all, but also working on this nonprofit and sharing my story and making sure others, you know, don't feel alone and that they feel like they can do it, you know, get through that journey. I mean, I I'm still very much interested in Asia. Like, that's really my heritage. You know, my parents literally immigrated from China to start a new life for us. And I feel like I, in a way, their work ethic and their passion to make sure that we have a good life has kind of inspired me as well, just to know that, like, you know, they work so hard. Like, I can also work hard in terms of, like, this mission, this. This idea, even though, you know, I'm not doing anything related to that. There's. It doesn't mean I'm not never going to, you know, there's always a, you know, possibility that I'll be back doing something, you know, related to that or, like, you know, traveling or I'd love to go back to Taiwan, especially since my husband's from there. So we love to, you know, bring my baby there and introduce him to a culture and history that I really fell in love with.

So I guess your parents must be very proud of this new mission that you're working on.

Oh, absolutely. They are like kids to heart's biggest fans. They are always so willing to help out, and my dad literally does most of deliveries at this point to the hospitals nearby.

Wow, okay.

Yeah. I literally was just having this conversation yesterday with my husband about, hmm, like, should I, like, get some help? You know, so my dad doesn't have to do all those deliveries. It's either him or me, you know, but especially now as a mom, it's a lot harder. But he's like, you know what? There's really no way. Like, especially, you know, your dad's always happy to help anyway. Like, I don't think he would want to pass it on to anyone else to really do those deliveries. And logistically anyway, so, yeah, in the end, like, my parents are just so happy and proud of, like, everything that's, you know, ended up happening out of a terrible situation. And, you know, especially my dad, I was able to actually bring him last year to the L'Oreal Paris celebration where I was honored as one of the women of worf. And so it was very much, like, something that I was proud to do because I wanted to have him see just how much of an impact that he has been helping to make as well. So that was just something that was very special to me and him.

That's awesome. I'm curious, while I'm thinking about it, did you ever find the person that gave you that initial kit?

Yes. Oh, my gosh. She is a sweetheart. So we haven't met in person yet, but we have connected over email, the phone, and also zoom. And it's because she lives, like, in eastern Maryland, and it's a bit of a trek and we have our own issues that has prevented us from actually meeting in person. But, yeah, I reached out because she did. In that care path, she did leave her email, and so I remember emailing her while I was still in the hospital, literally saying, hey, I just received your care package. Like, thank you so much. Like, I'm so inspired. And she's been actually a huge supporter as well. She even donates items for our care kits, too.

That's so sweet.

Yeah, it's very sweet. Like, she actually still does these care packages herself, but it's not as part of, like, an official organization or anything. It's very much for her, like, something that is also, like, a passion and where she also has a lot of help in her community. But for me, like, yeah, I decided to, I guess, turn it into an official nonprofit, make it harder on myself, actually, because it's all paperwork and logistics. But, yeah, she's amazing, and I'm just very grateful to know her. She's such a sweetheart.

That's awesome. I love that ripple effect that she left that initial package, and now it's become this organization that you're running. That's so cool. How many kits have you distributed so far?

So since 2020, which is when we started, we've given out over 8000 care kits.

Wow.

Yeah.

That's super impressive.

Yeah. Thank you.

And what, just for people who don't know, myself included, what is in a kit?

Great question. So it's based on the items that I found to be useful during treatments, but also speaking to other nurses and other patients about what they would have loved to have to support them throughout their treatment. So these include, like, liquid iv or any kind of, like, hydration packs just to, you know, make sure people are staying hydrated with the electrolytes. And we have organic teas. We include hand sanitizers, face masks, reusable water bottles, healthier protein snacks, other than the really gross insurer that the hospital will give out to patients. And, yeah, we also include a bunch of, like, beautiful handmade items that are made by, you know, talented volunteers. A lot of them are actually students. And so these will be, like, heart pillows to protect, you know, surgical sites, but also just as a comfort item. Since we started in the pandemic, we included, like, sewn masks because a lot of people picked that up as well as a skill. And so that was something nice to include as well. And, yeah, we just really try to pack it with a bunch of tools and resources. So we partner with triage cancer, which focuses on financial literacy and insurance support and all of that. Yeah, it's just things that I personally felt like we wanted to share and make the experience just a little bit more comfortable and better for not only patients, but also their caregivers. We have handwritten letters as well, and we actually received a testimonial recently where the patient not only wrote, like, the sweetest message for us, but also paid it forward by making a really generous donation. And they said, you know, when they received the care package, it literally moved not only him, but also his wife to tears. Just reading, like, the handwritten notes that come with it and seeing the all and feeling the love that was put into putting it all together.

Wow. I just want to time out and say thank you for what you're doing. Like, just hearing you describe that, it's just, it's just so touching. I just really appreciate that you're doing that work, because it sounds like it's something that's really needed. And. And, yeah, I just want to say thank you.

Thank you. That means a lot. I mean, it gives me joy to give joy, so it's. I don't see it as really work. It's really just something that I feel called to do and something that I really enjoy doing. Yeah.

Yeah, that's great. You just mentioned one story where you feel fondness for, like, the. The gratitude that you received back from giving a kid. Do you have any other stories where you. You look back and you're like, oh, that really made a difference.

Yeah. So. Oh, man. So over the years, we've definitely received a lot of messages and even handwritten notes that are mailed back to us about just how much these kids meant to them. I would say one of the stories that pop out right now is Annapolis holds this annual National Cancer Survivor's day celebration. What we do is just basically have a table there and share the resources that we offer and what we do. And then, so, like, the hospitals, patients, and families are invited to just, like, walk around, enjoy, mingle, you know, all of that. And so while we were doing this last year, someone walked up to us and was like, hey, I actually received one of your kids. Then she got really emotional and started tearing up and just, like, talking about how much it really meant to her. And coincidentally, like, the volunteer who wrote the card mentioned something about, oh, like, if you ever need to feel, like, a little happier or more joyful, like, listen to some K pop. And she's like, it was such a coincidence because I love K pop. And, like, she was just, like, really raving about, like, just that card that she got in the care package, and then. So it just made me feel like, wow. Like, it was great to meet, not only, like, physically meet someone who had actually received a kit, but also hear, like, how it really helped her. So we ended up taking a picture together. Like, it was just, it was just a really nice moment to actually meet people that we've helped because, of course, since we started in the pandemic, I feel like that really set the tone for everything. Even with hospital drop offs, we just drop them off with the nurse and then go. We don't actually can deliver it to patients. We also just ship them to patients as well. So we don't really do a lot of in person contact, which is sometimes for the better. But that moment really just stood out to me because I thought, I'm just glad that I can finally meet people and just know and hear from people directly about how much it means to them. And they always. A lot of these recipients will also want to pay it forward, just like I have, knowing that I did it because I was paying it forward. And so we'll have these recipients then turn into volunteers who are writing letters and submitting origami and all these things back to us. So it's just nice to know that it's not just, it doesn't stop there. The kindness is just continuing to ripple forward, and it's just great to know that, that we can have that impact.

That's so cool. I just want to, like, sit with it and, you know, just, like, feel the warmth. It's just so great. So you said you don't necessarily work directly with patients. You kind of drop these packages off and go. But is there something that you would like listeners to know about the people that you serve? We've kind of talked about your experience where you felt a lot of, at times, maybe a little bit of hopelessness, and not to mention the fear of where your journey could end up if you weren't able to take care of the symptoms that you were dealing with. Do you hear those stories, too, from people that you help with these kits?

Yeah. So ever since we launched our new program, I've actually been able to witness a lot more firsthand stories from these patients. So we started, like, an art for cancer wellness program a few years ago. And through that program, we offer virtual workshops that are led by art therapists that help patients heal through the medium of art. And in these sessions, I'm tuning in actually to most of these sessions and listening to people talk about their experiences. And it's really incredible, like, how art and also just being in a group setting with other people, going through similar situations, can really help and provide that safe space for people to not only not feel so alone, but feel, in a way, like, hopeful to know that other people are going through very difficult times, but they are also able to come into these spaces and smile and be joyful laughs. But also, there might be some tears here and there, but in the end, like, they are all so supportive of each other, and they literally even make friends through these groups, and which is really amazing to see. I received a message, for example, from one of these participants who really felt so strongly about how these groups have helped her connect with basically a new best friend. Unfortunately, that best friend ended up passing away from cancer, and both of them had participated in our groups. But she was just so grateful that through these groups, she was able to even meet her in the first place. And it just made me really, like, emotional, because I, like, couldn't believe that something like this could allow that connection to happen and allow her to feel, like, so. Like she had met, like, a best friend and that they could talk about so much. And, yeah, I just feel really sad, of course, that cancer just, like, takes away so much, but at the same time, can really create such beautiful moments and things like this. So, yeah, I just find it really interesting that despite all the terrible things that happened because of cancer, you know, we can create these spaces for people to connect, even if they're not even in the same city or county or even state, they can really, like, bond in this way. So I've been really fortunate to be able to witness these moments of, like, connection. And, of course, it's hurt, but also a lot of joy and accomplishments here, too, of, like, oh, I just finished treatments or, like, I was able to do this and that, and I had a clear scan, like, just, like, small, like, wins here and there. So I really love tuning in, and it makes me feel like, okay, like, these workshops, like, are really important. Like, these support groups basically are very vital to a patient's well being.

So as we're winding down here, how can we support kids to heart?

Yeah, you know, there are many ways to show support, whether it's, you know, making a donation or simply just following what we do on social media, that always means a lot to know that, you know, people care and see our work. We're on all the social media, Facebook, Instagram, what was formerly Twitter, now x, LinkedIn, even. And, you know, if people are interested, we have various service projects that are really suitable for all ages. So, you know, whether you just want to, you know, write some inspiring, encouraging cards or, you know, make some really comfy fleece blankets where, you know, we're open to, you know, however people want to help us. We post a lot of opportunities on our websites with step by step instructions on how to do it, where to even buy, like, materials if you guys want to host. Also, like, kind of like an event for your school, your workplace, things like that. We're really grateful for any way that people can show support, and that includes collection drives, too. So, you know, the items that go into our kits include, like, hand sanitizers, protein bars, things that actually, we have an Amazon wish list for people to easily just go and, like, purchase, and it would go straight to us. And without even having to have people drop them off or anything like that. So that's one way. Or of course, you know, if people are willing to host a service event along with a collection drive so people can come and do the service but also drop off items, that's great, too. So, yeah, there's always ways to help out. If, you know, anyone ever has any ideas as well, I welcome any ideas. So feel free to reach out through the social media channels or on our [email protected], dot.

How can someone request a kid?

Yeah, so right on the homepage, you know, if anyone knows anyone who may need a little bit of love and joy and hope, please feel free to just request a kit. It's on a pay as you can basis. So really, if you aren't able to really afford a kit, you don't have to pay for it. You just have to pay for the shipping. But other than that, you know, we've had such a range of donations come through that way, you know, if people can't afford it, they just pay nothing. And then, or if people really feel like they want to give back and pay it forward, they will, you know, donate, you know, 100 or $200 even to, you know, ship a kit. And if you're located in Maryland and are treated in the DMV area, then let us know which hospital you're at. And if we aren't already delivering the kits there, then please reach out and let us know and we'll deliver them there, too.

Is there anything I haven't asked that you'd like to talk about?

Oh, I feel like we definitely covered a lot. I hope that anyone who's listening feels inspired, but also, if they happen to be going through, you know, doesn't have to be cancer necessarily, but any kind of, like, difficult moment in their life just to know that they really are never alone. There are communities out there, and there are people out there that really care and are rooting for them. And it's all about just, you know, making sure that you are able to sometimes, yes, the only way is through, but there is a way I mean, I, at my lowest point, definitely felt hopeless and not sure, you know, what would happen and where my life would go. But now, you know, I have a really beautiful family. I have a healthy baby boy, and life is not perfect, but, of course, just nothing that I would have ever imagined. And I'm really happy to be able to, you know, not only enjoy the life that I have now, but also hopefully, you know, keep helping other people and, you know, paying that kindness board.

All right, that's all I have.

Well, thank you so much. Yeah, I'm glad my dog didn't keep barking after the beginning.

That's okay. Yeah, I forgot all about that. It didn't last very long.

Okay, well, thank you so much. I really am grateful just to be able to share my story. It's always a pleasure to, you know, talk about, you know, everything that's happened, but how it's been turned into a positive.

This is the plural of you. I'm Josh Morgan, and the show's website is pluralview.org. That's all for now. Thank you.